Wake Up

When I first moved out of my house and to my apartment, it began to be routine for me to wake up ridiculously early and spend time with God in the Word and in prayer. I have somewhat fallen away from that. Not completely, but I definitely don't give myself the time that I used to give myself. Now I have time to get through a few chapters and maybe do some reflection, and maybe not. The purpose of this blog is to give me space to reflect every morning. I want to have a goal that I can easily be accountable to. Maybe nobody will read this. But if you are reading and you see that I begin to skip days... or say things that are not really thought out, please call me on it. I find that the longer I lay in bed the more likely I am to sin. Yeah, it may sound crazy, but when I am laying in my bed in the morning being sluggish, sinful thoughts tend to creep in my head. But when I get up, my thoughts are much more God glorifying. So that is another reason for this. I want my thoughts to go straight to God right out of bed.

I guess what I have recently been reflecting on has been hearing the voice of God. I have recently decided to read the bible cover to cover. This morning I began Leviticus. When I read about how God spoke to the people I get so jealous sometimes. God spoke to Moses like they were BFFs, he brought him to a mountain and just spoke. Moses knew exactly what God wanted him to do. He gave him the exact measurements for the ark of the covenant, the lamp stand, and everything else for the temple. There was not much that Moses had to figure out for himself. And I so often just wish that God would take me into a cloud and tell me all of his plans. Man, I want to see the back of God!

But maybe it wouldn't have been so great back then. I then realized that although God spoke very clearly, he spoke to very few people. He had his chosen people, the Israelites, and he didn't even speak to all of them directly. They definitely saw his power at work plenty of times, but the relationship aspect was a lot different that it is now. God now will speak to all of us, not just a chosen few. I realized how thankful I am that I at least get spoken to personally, even if I can't always hear it clearly. I don't know how well I would respond to someone else telling me what God told me to do. When Jesus came to the earth, it changed things so much. The Holy Spirit was a huge force in the old testament, people say that it was the cloud and pillar of fire that led the Israelites out of Egypt and into the promise land. And that incredible force has been put inside of every single Christian. Jesus became the atonement sacrifice for us so that God no longer saw us as such screw-ups. The old testament sacrifices were only temporary, they had to continually offer sacrifices whenever they sinned, so God could not dwell with them. They were too sinful. We might even be more sinful than they were, but Jesus paid the price for it all. And when God looks at us he sees perfection, because of the price his perfect son paid. Now with a clean slate the Holy Spirit can dwell inside of us, so that we can be the major force of God.

This is all kind of thinking out loud. I am not trying to put this together really well, so i am sorry if it sounds somewhat random. But here is my closing thought:

God doesn't so much speak as loud and clear as he once did, because his spirit lives inside of us. We are a part of him and he is a part of us. We hear him much more personally, we hear him through thoughts, dreams, people around us, ect. Sure, I still wish that I could hear him loud and clear telling me exactly what to do from time to time. But our relationship then would be a lot less wild, mysterious, and exciting.

I think that's what I will reflect about tomorrow... relationship. Well that is all I have time for this morning. I will leave with a prayer:

God, thank you so much for your goodness. You are more perfect than I can comprehend. I am in awe of your majesty and your perfect plans. I ask that you will carry out your plans in me whether I am aware of them or not. I am so imperfect, I cannot see the picture that you are painting, but use me in whatever way you see necessary. I want to offer you control of me, because I am incapable of controlling myself and I have proven it over and over. God, take this broken down shell of me and use me to make your name great. Thank you for your love that is beyond human understanding. Wrap me in your love and grace and let other people see that and be blessed. I love you Lord. There is nobody more deserving of my love than you. Continue transforming my heart and making me new every day. In Jesus' perfect and holy name, Amen.